The Arranged Marriage Debacle

Arranged marriages problems Asian brides India Pakistan

Sh*t only Asian Girls would understand.

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Hold on tight you guys because this one’s going to hit you in the feels…

***This isnt for guys who are working hard to make a living or hit it big. You go get it bro, I wish there were more guys doing what you are doing. But there are worse guys than you out there… You know it.

I was recently contacted by the Matrimonial Comittee. They wanted to see me and conduct a counseling session (or what I like to call a verbal rape session). My parents decided to call them over (even though I had half a mind to blow them off)

They came, sat and rambled. Rambled on about how marriage is the most important thing in the world. How it’s all for the better for the society and my izzat and how I should get married whilst in my prime. Or else, I am never going to be able to bag a nice guy.

By nice guy, they mean a 30+ adolescent man-child, who couldn’t care less about finding a suitable girl whilst in his 20s, because he was too busy conquering the world (or getting potty trained I am not sure)

Because apparently, they are so awesome with their fragile little egos, and their absolute ignorance about how to really get a nice girl to settle with them, not to mention the misogyny. And against all odds, every 22 year old damsel is dying to marry them.

After all this 3rd degree, they started asking questions. Or rather another one of their many, if not all the ways of insulting the larki walas (the prospect bride’s family).

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Q1 (to my parents) : Are you willing to marry your daughter?

My father answer: No. Because apparently, to you people, I, and all other fathers that educate their daughters are eunuchs and we want to live off the millions of dollars she is earning.

My answer. No. Because apparently all the girls who educate themselves want to live as nuns and not get married. Because duh, it’s directly related. I should have seen it coming. I must be stupid to think I’d get a nice guy if I have decent qualification. I should have stayed a book-virgin.

Q2: so you would work after marriage?

My answer (in my head): Wow, well that’s not personal enough. Why don’t you ask me if I would love my future husband or murder him. Nay, better. Why don’t you come upclose and count the hairs in my nostrils?

My answer, (for real): that’s not for you to ask. Stick to routine questions. Stay in your pants and don’t strip off mine. And leave some things to the boy and girl to discuss and decide if you please.
Also, how is marriage related to occupation? Do I necessarily have to give up my job just to impress a guy? Does a professional woman not make marriage material? And who’s to say there wouldn’t be a financial crisis in the household till the day I die?

Why all these unnecessary sacrifices to get married? Isn’t it enough that women make the biggest sacrifice of their lives by leaving their parents, coming and adjusting in a new place with new people, giving all their time to the new family and staying there their whole life?
Marriage is the beginning of a new life, not the end. We are getting married, not sentenced.

The PM (Of Pakistan) wants to give out small startups to rural women to raise their standards of living for a better economy. I am sorry but that’s not going to happen.

Women make almost 50% of a country’s population. And if men continue to lock up women indoors, how is this economy going to rise from the ashes? When did this stupid rule ever help the economy? Where did it lead our country anywhere toward prosperity? And how is this going to help in the future?
Women all over the world work, earn, and put their talent to good use. They still get married and have kids and become great wives and moms at that. Why can’t we do the same and put an end to this nonsense?

All guys should care about is, whether or not a girl would glue your family and your lives together with pleasant demeanor. Whether or not she would support you in all their endeavours. Whether or not she would love you…

I wrote this out of all the goodness of my heart. It’s sad to watch girls suffer like this and give in to pointless demands from the larka walas (prospective grooms’ family). I would love for all the young single/married girls to raise their voices against the issue. It’s for your good, and the country’s good altogether. 🙂


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